Inside my head or 0-Happy in 12 minutes

Posted: August 23, 2015 in Editorial, Motorcycle, My Life

This is what I think before and when I ride sometimes.  Welcome to the inside of my head, watch your step.

“What a bitch, I didn’t divorce her so I could hear from her more. LEAVE ME ALONE.  She can’t get to me on the bike, time for a ride. ”

I gather up my gear and head to the parking garage.

“Hello, beautiful, sure hope you don’t kill me today.  Key on, yep that’s the right noise, WAM.  I love that sound (fear melts), perfect, simply perfect.”  “I need to let this anger go, she’s a bitch and she treats the girls like shit, and my hands are tied.  I can’t change that, the courts said so.  The gear box is clunky, always is, even changed the oil.  Take it easy in the garage. Left, side street, there we go, wonderful noise.  One day at a time, all I can do is be ready in case something changes.  My hand doesn’t hurt today, excellent.”

“The only control she has over me is what I give her, focus on your daughters.  Second gear, I shouldn’t lug it today lets let a few revs out.  On ramp, winding out second, damn the front wheel is light, third.  You’re doing your best, you tell them you love them every time you talk to them, they’ll be ok, just be there.”  “Almost 100mph, absolutely nothing around, it’s even quieter the faster I go.  There’s the scream, fourth.  Just let it go, everything.  Blur, fifth, sixth, I’ll run out of highway before I run out of bike, time to come back down.”

“Everything is in slow motion now, time has slowed.  Fifth, fourth, snap, love the quickness, I think it, it happens.”  “Just wait, things change, be ready, be there.”  “Where to, doesn’t matter I have no where to go, where I want to be I can’t so just go.”

That’s it, I feel better, and nothing changed but me.




This is my oldest daughters hand print, she pressed it into some snow and took this photo, for some reason it always makes me smile.  It’s not hard to miss someone who would do this.  I hope you have a picture like this somewhere too.





  1. advgrrl says:

    I get your head 😉

  2. advgrrl says:

    Reblogged this on Advgrrl Motorcycle Adventures & More and commented:
    Simple post but says a lot…needed to reblog this for those out there who will understand…

  3. I’m with you brother! Stay safe.

  4. ljaylj says:

    Eventually, they go away…and your daughter realizes you aren’t the bad guy and you two talk on the phone a few times a week or visit when you can; and, she has kids and they love you, too.

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